Detroit Driving Tips for our 2006 Superbowl Guests
 

Stole this off another board...thought it was funny! :lol:


Detroit Driving Tips for our 2006 Superbowl Guests:

1. First, you must learn to pronounce the city name. It's Di-troit, NOT DEE-troit. If you pronounce it DEE-Troit then we will assume you are from Toledo and here for the country Music hoe-down.

2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Detroit has its own version of traffic rules... Hold on and pray!

3. The morning rush hour is from 6:00am to 10:00am. The evening rush hour is from 3:00pm to 7:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning. Weekends are open game.

4. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear-ended, cussed out and possibly shot. If you're first off the starting line when the light turns green, count to five before going. This will avoid getting in the way of cross-traffic who just ran their yellow light to keep from getting shot.

5. Schoenherr can ONLY be properly pronounced by a native of the Detroit metro area. That goes for Gratiot too.

6. Construction and renovation on I-94,I-96, I-75, I-275, I-375, The Lodge and The Southfield Freeways are a way of life. Just deal with it.

7. If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect or they are "out-of-towners."

8. All old men with white hair wearing a hat have total right-of-way.

9. The minimum acceptable speed on I-696 is 85 regardless of the posted speeds. Anything less is considered downright SISSY. Oh, and don't even think of allowing more than one car length between cars!

10. That attractive wrought iron on the windows and doors in Detroit is NOT ornamental. DO NOT get out of your car.

11. Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that reads "Keep honking, I'm reloading."

12. If you are in the left lane, and only going 70 in a 60 mph zone, people are not waving 'because they are so friendly in Detroit. I would suggest you duck.

13. I-275/I-696 is our daily version of NASCAR.

14. It's not M-10, it's "the Lodge".

15. That's not a lake, it's a pothole.

16. If someone tells you it's on Outer Drive, you better hope you have a map.

17. The left turn is simple. If you want to turn left, go a 1/4 of a mile past your turn, get to the left, then make a left, then make a right. NOW you have gone left.

9. The minimum acceptable speed on I-696 is 85 regardless of the posted speeds. Anything less is considered downright SISSY. Oh, and don't even think of allowing more than one car length between cars!


ah soo soo true. i love it

post theif!! haha..

:P :D

And you know what's great, you never lose the attitude. I've been gone for over 12yrs. now and every time I come back I fall right back into the mold, like I never left :2guns: :guns: :uzi:

The best part is when I was in Kentucky this past weekend, my cousins thought I was a complete nut the way I drive. I told them this was part of daily life here and they couldn't believe it.

Aahhh what it would be like to live the simple life :dazed:

Uh huh

it drove me nuts down there..people were actually content doing JUST the speed limit and not even that at times..then here's me going 15+ over on the way home...seemed like i was doing 150 compared to them..:lol:

I don't know how many times we cussed people out and tail-gated them with that big ass Ram grill about 6 inches away from their rear bumper. Oh yeah and that was at 60mph on I-75.

damn Yankees :D

I seriously thought about using the "pit" manuever about 30 times on the way home.

The first time I visited here back in December someone I was meeting for work asked how the drive from the airport was thinking I'd say thing to the extent people here were nuts. Fuck that, driving here just proved to me I wasn't the only one that drove like that, it is nice.

18. Turn signals are OPTIONAL.

19. WE DO NOT STOP FOR PEDESTRIANS!!!